Waking up day after day, month after month, year after year having a headache, nausea, brain fog, crushing fatigue, body aches, racing heart, anxiety, breathing problems, and digestive issues can be scary. This was my life for many years. What could possibly be causing all of these symptoms? Google will certainly help find the answers, right ? Pro tip, it does not. I became hyper focused on all my symptoms because it was impacting my daily life and I wanted it to end. I was searching for the next symptom that would help me solve the mystery of what was wrong with me. The more focused I became the worse my symptoms were; it was a vicious cycle.
I understood that my overwhelm was not helping my symptoms, but what I didn't understand was that my past trauma was at the heart of it all. My past wounds had programmed my brain in such a way that created these patterned thoughts, emotions, and behaviors I was experiencing (most of which were dysfunctional). These emotions, when not processed, get "stored" in the body and overtime this stress starts to impact our nervous system.
Our nervous system is responsible for so many of our bodily functions. One part of our nervous system is the Autonomic Nervous System (ANS). The ANS is responsible for controlling the automatic functions like our heart rate, temperature control, blood pressure, and digestion. The ANS connects our brain to most of our organs. It can help activate body processes in times of need, like during stress or danger. It is responsible for the fight or flight response. On the opposite end, it is responsible for the rest and digest processes. The ANS also plays an important role in regulating our immune system. One part of the ANS activates body processes and the other deactivates or lowers them; creating a balance in our system. When we experience chronic stress, this causes the nervous system to be continually activated. This loss of balance results in a dysregulated ANS.
Hopefully it's a little clearer to see how stress can have such a big impact on our physical body. When we're caught in the fight or flight state for long periods of time it can be very uncomfortable. Fortunately, there are steps we can take to bring us back in balance.
Awareness
We need to become aware of when we're triggered, or put into states of fight or flight, and what triggered us. For some, it may be easy to determine when we're triggered, but for others that are in a constant state of "high alert" it feels like everything is triggering. It's important to recognize when we're triggered so we can take immediate action to lower the arousal. If at the same time you can be aware enough to see what the trigger was we can later work with those parts that got overwhelmed by the situation.
Deep breathing
In the middle of being triggered an effective strategy to immediately calm yourself can be to do some deep breathing. Try this square breathing technique: Inhale to a slow count of four; hold for a slow count of four; exhale for a slow count of four; hold for a slow count of four. Repeat for three to six times. You can imagine drawing one line of a square for each of the four movements.
Rewire your brain
Once you're aware of the event that triggered you, you're one step closer to rewiring how your brain reacts to that situation in the future. Let's work this through with an example that has been brought up in a coaching session. The client finds that they get anxious every time they get on a conference call with fellow colleagues. They're aware that this happens with every call and they try to rationalize with that part that gets upset by telling themselves there is nothing to worry about (to no avail). By exploring deeper with the anxious part it is revealed that this part was humiliated in front of their six grade class. It fears the same thing might happen again in front of this group of colleagues. Our brain wants to protect us from harm, but the ways in which it attempts to do this are often dysfunctional (making us anxious when getting on a call that is completely safe). The coach is able to guide the client through releasing those burdens of that part and in a sense rewiring the neurons in the brain. The rewiring involves that part of the mind no longer connecting that getting up in front of a group means that they will get humiliated. This part sees that there are other possibilities because it's no longer stuck in that one situation back in sixth grade. The next time the client gets on a group call the anxiety is no longer there.
There is hope
After I became aware that the emotional stress I was under could be causing all my symptoms, I was able to start healing. Doing the inner work to rewire our old programming and to release the repressed emotions is not easy, but I can promise you it is so worth it. Finding a skilled practitioner, whether that be a therapist or a coach, is key to healing. If you're living in a constant state of fight or flight, please reach out.
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